Bob and I went to a sportsmen’s show. I guess I figured with all the sports men out and about doing sportsman stuff that there would be quite a few wives who used their alone time to make crafty things to sell at a sportsmen’s show. Then again, maybe a lot of woman go with their man on sporting outings ? Oh sure, there were a lot of display areas for fisherman, quite a few for hunting, various charter companies were represented. One building was for boats. Another building had camper type products and various cooking methods, and four wheeling machines. I guess this was not the time or place for crafts. I wish that my idea for ornament 2015 wasn’t already figured out or I might have figured a way to use fishing lure parts. My favorite display was the furniture crafted from logs, along with wrought iron sculpted pieces. I usually get business cards of my favorite display-so I can look them up on-line. For some reason, this year I didn’t. Towards the end of the second aisle, a flash of light caught my eye-from the peripheral. Let me take a detour. You see, with my ocular rosacea I experience these flashes of light. These happen at the end of the day when my eyes are exhausted. My eye doctor said it is common and nothing to worry about. After all, my eye evaluations showed no sign of worsening or of deterioration. The flashes of light happen when the nerves in the eyes are too active and it causes a type of misfire = sparks of light. I tried to say this as accurate as I could remember how my eye doctor explained things. Here is one article I found about ocular rosacea: http://www.allaboutvision.com/conditions/ocular-rosacea.htm I am quite relieved to learn that my flashes are misfires- hey,that kind of ties into the sportsmen’s show. For many months I had been nervous about what was happening to my eyes. Plus, this past week, a co-worker asked me how I learned what my eye problem was. She has an eye-lid irritation happening and no test has found the problem. Back to the show. I have not had a light flash episode happen in a well lit area, so this flash that caught my eye, startled me. I turned and saw a blinking star. I thought I had found a craft display. Nope. I was so intrigued by the star, I failed to ask any pertinent questions about the outdoor pole structure.s I did ask about the star, the attention getter-clever. The woman was caught off guard-for only a moment. I had asked where she found the star. I thought maybe a dollar store. No. She just couldn’t think where she had found them. She showed me how it twisted on , for blinking. Then, she remembered that she had the package and was able to dig it out from the bottom of a bag. She was sure she could tell me where to find them. As we looked at the package, there was not a single word typed, anywhere. Then she did the most wonderful thing, she looked up to the ceiling and said “Let me look in my folders.” I was so thrilled !!! Another person who folders, everything of each day-in their mind. I have not met another person who folders. She then looked down at the floor and said she just needed to sort through her folders. She was sure she would remember where she purchased the blinky star. For me, I actually stood there quietly, as I know for myself, I need quiet as I search through my folders for an answer. I told the woman she did not need to explain-I knew exactly what she was doing and I told her how wonderful it was to meet another person who folders Who would have thought a blinky star would lead me to another person who folders ? And, at a sportsmen’s show, of all places. As Anne Of Green Gables (my favorite) would say, “kindred spirits”. Because the woman could not figure out where she purchased the blinky star, she gave me one of the extras. Sometimes, just one little common makes one not feel so alone or too different. My grief battle this week: So, maybe I wasn’t thankful enough. I have heard many folks talk about how they were thanking God for various situations in their trial. AND how God miraculously healed someone, they believed because of their thankfulness. It made me start thinking; is that why Shawn didn’t survive ? Truth be told, I do not think I have thanked God for any part of Shawn’s situation-up to even now.. Here I go again, blaming myself for things not working out. I know folks will say there should be no guilt to be had. Well, this is what I have to say; until you have to have a talk with doctors about shutting life saving machines off, you have no clue what kind of guilt will be at your heart’s door, every moment. So what did God do at the height of this agonizing thinking about my not being thankful ? He had Mr. Squirrel visit the bus across from mine, again. You see, I was getting ready to clock in. I was going to dump my garbage first. As I was going past my co-worker’s bus , I thought it odd he was just sitting in his bus seat. As I looked more closely, it was not a person. Mr. Squirrel was sitting on the steering wheel. His paws were at his 10 & 2. His little head was looking right and left, as if he was readying to drive out. I quickly, put my garbage back in my bus and grabbed my phone. I was sure I was going to get a cute photo for my next post. As I stood in front of the bus, focusing on Mr. Squirrel, he gave me a bothered look. I thought I hit the take photo button. No picture came to my phone, and Mr. Squirrel scampered down the bus aisle. Each time the guilt of un-thankfulness leading to Shawn’s death, grows to an eruptive state the remembrance of Mr. Squirrel, on the bus steering wheel, gives me a chuckle. I don’t care that a lot of folks think of squirrels as rodents and mischievous, God seems to be using Mr. Squirrel to give me chuckle moments, lately.